Been up since 4ish am and all I've managed to complete is a paltry total of 2 chapters. Ha ha. It just takes me longer than the average human (or animal maybe) to understand concepts involving numbers, diagrams or graphs.

I guess I am, and always will be an arts student at heart. Nothing thrills me more than slaving over 3000 word essays... Not!

Anyway, here's a verse that came to me whilst listening to "Storm" just awhile ago.




As we "run with endurance the race that is set before us", let's not cease to look unto Jesus. (Lest all that we strive for be in vain.)

:)

Be blessed! And study super duper hard. Like how I am going to attempt to, right now.

Bye.

I really miss home.

Anyway, it is The Exam Period and in a typical Jamie-the-Procrastinator fashion, I spent some time (fine, a lot of precious time) reading some of my writings circa 2005-2007, and oh my! It's the memories... the battles conquered, or lost... the circumstances of that time... the same lame humor. Some things just never change huh?

Looking back, I never thought things would turn out this way. During last Saturday's morning prayer meeting aka the sleep thief, Josh touched on some cheem topic involving expectations, perception and some other "---tions" that I can't remember now since I failed to take notes. (And this, boys and girls, is why your cell leader insists you take notes.) Well, I don't quite remember the exact content of what he said, but taking it to my point in this post, I guess that the "Me" of those past words would never have expected happiness to come in a form other than that which she has staunchly envisioned. I can't say either that I am in a completely happy-clappy state right now, but, I have conquered much. I have grown much. I have gained much.

And I am fairly happy, even though I am not where I wanted to be.

So I guess, the point here is that our reality tends to be coloured (or in this case, discoloured) by our perceptions. We imagine the road to happiness to be a certain way, starting point, hurdles, finish line and all. We think we will only be truly happy as long as we stay on course and complete the steps.

But, having come to this point in my life, I am inclined to believe that happiness is not really a neatly defined road at all. In fact, as a believer, I reckon happiness is overrated. It is at best, a transient ascend to one of the many peaks in life. A fleeting burst of endorphins before the vicissitudes of life plunges us into the nearest valley, and the happiness we felt before is no more.

That is not to say we shouldn't strive for happiness. I'd be a crazy (and sick) person not to want to be happy. But I think I'd much rather have joy, which is not found in/on a linear journey of achieved expectations. I can't be happy when the going gets tough, but I can still rejoice that I can trust in Him. I can't be happy in the dark and uncertain valleys of life, but I can still rejoice that I am not alone. I can't be happy where I am, but I will rejoice because He holds my future.

Happiness is for the moment. Joy is eternal. And it is gained from a close relationship with Him.

Is that right? Ah whatever. That conclusion shall suffice, for now, because the birds have begun their morning call and I am still not in bed. Anyway... this is a bit random and off-track but I'm just gonna shove a chunk of resolutions in here for good measure. I am resolving to spend more time in His presence, to study hard, and to live healthily. (I am effing lardy at the moment. I disgust myself. LL) If I could get past myself and do it all before, I can surely do it all again this time.

Right. And for the viewing pleasure of mine and thine, may I present to you the gorgeous twins that are the current obsession (and stalk-victims) of many hot-blooded males in my church. I really like this song. I think Janice & Sonia (wah...machiam my BFF liddat...) did an ace cover. So to heck with that bandwidth, click on the play button and be enthralled by their awesomeness. 

Behold.


... because Your cross has placed in me my worth.

So, I was returning home from school today, doing the usual keying in of the pin number to open the gate. When it (the gate, not the keypad) remained motionless after a few tries, I got a little frustrated at what seems like the umpteenth time it's malfunctioning.

Then, the proverbial moment of realization came, albeit more than a couple of seconds late to save me from this utter stupidity and the resultant embarrassment.

Turns out, I had keyed the pin number... for my EFTPOS card. Repeatedly.

Honestly, I need to stop shaming my parents with these retarded things I do. Or maybe, I just need to spend less and stop over-utilizing EFTPOS, that my fingers should move oh-so-automatically towards those familiar secret-digits.

(6 years on and I still find it weird to call it EFTPOS. It just doesn't roll off the tongue as easily as the way ATM does eh?)

So, the SFAS vortex came, and left. Now it's time to get back to the student reality of books, books and more books. Which, incidentally I have yet to start, since I've been pretty much sick like a dog, and sleeping like a log.

Ha ha ha. No illness can quell my insatiable aptitude for lame-ness.

Anyway... so yes, I need to get out of this funk and start getting my groove on. Commence the humdrum but necessary (and emotionally-stabilizing) routine of studying, jogging and healthy eating... all of which were put to a (hopefully temporal) cease with the whirlpool of activities that defined the past couple of weeks.

Alright! The ants don't wait. Time to arise from my slumber.


Oh, and I didn't know how to include these pictures in a cohesive manner, so I'm just gonna post them up anyway, for the viewing pleasure of those who care. Saw them in Country Road recently and was kinda tempted, but thankfully, good sense prevailed.


Ha. A bit of a disclaimer here (if you can call it that). I don't feel the need to make any apologies for being a bit of a shopaholic. (except, maybe to my long-suffering dad :p) Neither do I feel that a post such as this necessitates a disclaimer of any sort. BUT, and highly contradictorily so, I just can't help feeling slightly irked when my interest in these fashiony things is immediately linked to me being vapid, or bimbotic. Yes, I am irritated. Even if I may grin or fake-laugh at your very un-funny comment just so you don't have to feel bad. :)

3 mid-semesters down. 1 more to go. Oh, and that assignment too...

But first, Mr Brown.

That aside, I thought yesterday's daily devotion from www.konghee.com was really good. Read it here.

I guess it isn't anything particularly illuminating, or groundbreaking. But sometimes, a simple, yet poignant reminder is all that's needed to jolt one out of limbo and back onto the right path of the straight and the narrow.

Not that I was in limbo of course. (Oh my goodness! I just googled the word "limbo" to make sure I wasn't misusing the word, and found that it also refers to something like "the border of hell". Huh? How frightful is that?!)

Anyway! I'm not one to write multiple-paged theological discourses expounding on things/issues I'm not sure I'm even qualified to talk about. (As you can already tell from the trivial and frivolous nature of the blog.) However, I did/do like this particular line, and am going to share it here, because sharing is caring. Ha ha.




Aye Aye Captain! (No, although it is immensely cool, this isn't part of the quote. It's just my inner sailor concurring with Pastor Kong. What? You mean you don't have an inner sailor as well? You're weird...)

Well, in a perfect world, we can all easily (and sweat-freely) exercise this power of obedience, and be released into true freedom. But in the wretched and broken place that we are stuck in for this short moment... "what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do..." (Rom 7:15). Thankfully, our good and gracious God reminds us that “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” (2 Cor 12:9)

Aye Aye, my friends on the same boat.

"So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong." (2 Cor 12:9-10)

Finally, the hideously belated end to my winter break has crept up on me, casting its morose shadow over the sunshine that once was.

:(

I know, life goes on. In the real world, quarter-of-a-century-year-olds (barely if I may so add) do not lament the loss of time spent with loved ones, or shy away from the impending darkness of New Challenges that unfortunately, beckons with its gnarled fingers and evil cackles. No Sire! They take up their swords and amours and they fight. Yes! Valor and courage is/are the order of the day!

Argh. Sounds heaps tiring already. Makes me wanna crawl back into the rat-hole that is under my covers. (Incidentally, I never realized just how comfortable my bed actually is. It is like, a tender and comforting hug from the fluffiest cloud that ever existed.)

But, as the lines of my old college anthem would urge, "Up & On! Up & On!"

Yes. "Up & On" it was, and "Up & On" it shall be.

Now, please excuse me while I go achieve great things.

And by the way, why are the better-looking guys mostly gay? It's annoying.